love yourself

It’s not easy for women to love themselves through loss.  We’re so accustomed to caring for others and shoving our own needs aside that when it comes time for us to support ourselves, we don’t feel worthy.

On this episode, Becky Barber, co-creator of the Try Self-Love Podcast, shares her story of 6 pregnancy losses and how having living children doesn’t heal the grief that came with her losses. We discuss:

  • the shame and guilt that come with pregnancy loss, infertility and childlessness
  • how detaching from hope doesn’t make it any easier
  • how to love yourself through any loss including the loss of an identity, such as “mother” for childless women   

Becky is a life and relationship coach who helps women to learn to love and respect themselves despite a damaged relationship  with someone they love. Through spirituality, healthy boundary-setting and a continual practice of self-love, Becky was able to break free of her own toxic relationship with her mother and now helps others to do the same. 

Here are some of the highlights: 

4:07  – Becky’s story of pregnancy loss

5:10 – How shame plays into the grief of miscarriage, infertility and childlessness

9:26 – How preparing yourself for disappointment or walling yourself off doesn’t help

16:40 – The ways in which we compare our grief with that of others

22:05 – How to cultivate self-love through grief

31:55 – The loss of the mother identity for the childless

42:12 – How our own mothers are not the best for comforting us and, in most cases, not our friends either

46:55 – The shame we carry when we don’t get along with our mothers

Click here to listen and review on your favourite platform!

If you found this episode valuable and supportive of your emotional journey through childlessness, please consider rating, reviewing, and following my show.  By doing that, you’ll be helping other women just like you to find the comfort and support that they are looking for too.  Click here to leave a review and follow!

References from this episode:

Becky’s website: www.beckybarbercoaching.com

Becky’s offer of 2 free coaching sessions – contact her on Facebook or by email

The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk


Sheri Johnson